Hitlerbitch did not author the following diatribe. It has been stolen from The Church of the Subgenius. It is not for the faint-hearted.

I haven't had a fucking cigarette in over TWO WEEKS you stupid fucking TURD THROAT ASS FUCKERS who would rather baste 18 tons of SHIT with the rancid fucking PISS of 49,000,000,000 retarded DICK-SHITTERS and then eat it in front of a room-full of dead WHIGGER-SHITTERS than BREATHE AIR, you lame-o, jit-bagged, RAT FELCHING, camba dick juking, lap-fuck-vomit fucking, puke-fuckers!   I think each and EVERY one of you alt.slack.shitz is without a fucking DOUBT IN HELL the most UNINTELLIGENT, UGLY, zit-infested, corpulent, SNOT-FUCKING, DEAD NUTRI-SEXUAL SLIDER-TOADED, ass-kissing fucking ASSHOLES on this morbidly failing PLANET!!!!!!   I've firmly decided to GIVE EACH OF YOU a Thai Pepper/Muriatic Acid enema and then stuff about a half a ton of LEECH SPERM up your pecker-ho'ed ASSHOLES and then sell videos of it to your fucked up MOTHERS you fucking SNOT-LICKING FUCK-STUMPS!!!!   You IGNORANT dog-shit-sluicers wouldn't know a brain cell if it snuck up behind you and plugged you right in your seriously diseased RECTUM!   Every one of you DUMBASSES spends his or her or its lunch hours constructing massive, sky-high mounds of fly-specked POODLE COCKS which you then proceed to BUTTFUCK for the entire rest of the afternoon, which makes ALL OF YOU about as worthless as tits on a boar.   You suck WHALE DRECK till the fucking COWS COME HOME and then YOU FUCK THE FUCKING COWS, you STUPID MORONIC lizard cunt lickers!!!!   I'd kick each of you in the BALLS for about a year STRAIGHT if you had balls to kick you SHIT-CUNTED fuck-sticks who shit in buckets that are ALREADY made out of shit and then stuff the SHIT-BUCKETS full of shit up your ALREADY shit stuffed NOSTRILS and THEN butt-fuck (AGAIN!) those piles of MAGGOT-ENCRUSTED bat shit that I mentioned in an earlier diatribe.   YOU LICK DOGS!   (Oh, by the way, did I happen to mention that you're ALL FUCKED UP? Well you ARE!)   You're all so fucking screwed in the head that you spend ALL NIGHT searching for winos who have recently died, drag the rotting, puffed up corpses home, let them rot a for a couple of more weeks, hire ALL YOUR FUCKED UP NEIGHBORS to piss on those dead fuckers' HEADS, wait ANOTHER couple of months and then, when the bodies are so fucking stench-endowed and putrid that it would make a fucking HYENA puke, you BUTT FUCK THEM TWENTY TIMES A FUCKING HOUR until your fucking DICKS are puking BLOOD instead of CUM, which you proceed to lap up like SHIT MAGGOTS until you're so engorged with DEATH FUCK and SHIT CUM that you puke all over yourselves and then buttfuck the fucking PUKE while a GILA MONSTER fucks YOU up the THROAT WOUND you stupid, SHIT-SMEARED FEVER WANKERS!!!!!!!!   I think you'd SUCK SHIT OUT OF A MULE if you thought about it for a couple of milliseconds you stupid ASSHOLES.   I heard just the other day that everybody on alt.slack sticks their fingers up each other's assholes and then SNIFFS IT!!!!   HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!   How do you think that fucking LOOKS, you SHIT SNARFING colla-felchers?   I'll tell you.   It looks PRETTY FUCKED UP, that's how.   I hate ALL of you and so does my shit.

Hitlerbitch ... where love reigns supreme